TheSylvans.com

We spent New Year's Day the best way I can think of: at the beach.  Mother Nature must have felt like welcoming the new year too, because it was in the low to mid 70's in Santa Cruz with very little wind - terrific beach weather.  The sea was feeling friendly too, with mid sized waves just right for the kids to boogie board, or like I did, to surf on a longboard.  A little volleyball and some hot dogs roasted over a fire, and then finish they day with a trip to Maryann's ice cream.  

 Hopefully a day that sets the tone for the rest of the year.

Idea for powerpoint / lecture / something

Apple - the core has seeds, that's what's important to the tree

Core values (diagram showing circle within a circle)

Venn diagram shows to people (with cores)

Shifting core values (discomfort)

Maybe sitting leaning to one side to illustrate discomfort 

I do not believe in punishing my kids.  That is to say, I do not believe that a parent should do something bad to their children when the child misbehaves as a way to prevent the child from misbehaving again.

 Unfortunately, I haven't always been able to live up to that standard.  I have never hit my kids (spanked them, or otherwise), but the child psychology-ish speakers I've listened to - where I got a lot of ideas I have about good parenting - promoted the idea of "consequences" instead of punishment, and sometimes it seems like a pretty fine line.

 Sometimes this is very natural and simple - if you don't eat your dinner, you can't have dessert.  This just feels reasonable, and I do not feel at all that withholding dessert is "punishing" my child.  But in other situations the line becomes very fuzzy... what about when one kid whacks the other one?  What's the consequence of that?  The kid that got whacked has a bruise, that's what.  If there's going to be any other consequence (that the whacker can comprehend, anyway) it's got to come from me, and whether it's a lecture, timeout, or loss of a "privilege", it's smacks of punishment.  But I don't have any brilliant ideas...

Ben often has a hard time finishing a meal he doesn't like in a timely manner, especially when there is a good distraction, like a movie or cartoon.  The other night Ben was still finishing his chicken (yuck) when bedtime rolled around, so when he wanted ice cream I said he should've asked earlier.  So tonight, in the middle of a show, he asked for ice cream, and when we pointed out that we're in the middle of a show, he said, "Well if I ask you later, you'll say I should've asked you earlier!"

Laughing, we had to concede the point, and all took a break for ice cream.

Too much to update...

Cub and Boy Scouts has been eventful.  Pinewood Derby was great, both boys did terrific building their cars (including using the jig saw and power sander themselves!) and both boys placed well - Eli got 5th (I think) overall! I may end up being Cub Master as the Pack is losing a lot of leaders as the graduate to Boy Scouts.  On that topic, Eli bridged to Boy Scouts at the Blue and Gold dinner during a really cool bridging ceremony. 

Thanksgiving was pretty terrific - a fantastic feast where everyone pitched in (Ben helped Joann make blueberry pie, and Eli helped make pumpkin pie).  At our house we traditionally go around the table to say what we're thankful for, and I was a little surprised when Ben volunteered to go first (I mean really volunteered, like before we sat down to dinner or anything, he asked if he could go first).  Turns out he had his thanks all worked out and was ready to go.

 On a completely unrelated thought, a bunch of things have been getting on my nerves lately, from the spin the right wing is putting on the election, to the TSA policies, to other non-political things.  I was really bothered by some of the commercials where the republicans painted themselves as the party for freedom, when what the really mean is just freedom from taxes - they certainly aren't the party for freedom of speech, or religion, not when the speech is against them and the religion isn't Christian.

 And I had this other thought, upon reading the umpteenth right wing pundit's complaint that all us bleeding heart liberals need to suck it up, that the Patriot Act and all it's kind are necessary to keep us safe:  *you* need to suck it up and realize that even if you get your way and transform the U.S.A. into a police state, we still won't be safe.  We're the land of the free and home of the brave - no safety is implied.

 Don't get me wrong - I want to be safe.  I want my family to be safe.  But life is dangerous and we're more likely to be killed by a car crash than by a terrorist.  If we're really talking about safety,l then let's talk about safety by the numbers, okay? Otherwise it's all politics and speeches, and no substance. 

I went to check on the boys (at 10pm, they're in bed) and Ben was writing cartoons (comics) in a book by flashlight.  "Timmy the explorer".  Eli had written some too, "Stupid Guy".

The boys spent the last three nights sleeping in a tent in the back yard.  Our tent has a mesh top, and they wanted to "sleep under the stars".  But tonight they're back indoors (I put away the tent before it kills the grass).